


I Heard Him in my Head

by dreamingKatfish



Series: Oumasaitwitterweek 2019 [5]
Category: New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Hurt No Comfort, I'm Sorry, Kinda, M/M, Oumasaitwitterweek2019, POV First Person, Psychic Bond, and pissed, cant forget that part, especially without the other ending, guess i'll die, im not actually sure, im not actually sure what i should say, ouma is sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-22
Updated: 2019-07-07
Packaged: 2020-05-16 08:21:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,914
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19314301
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dreamingKatfish/pseuds/dreamingKatfish
Summary: "This feels like such bullshit. I feel like I've just bullshitting everyone this week.""Well, it's not my fault!""Uh, yeah it fucking is! I've asked you to tell me what happened and I'll put it in proper format, that's it. Which means this is entirely your fault.""Well, what do you want me to do about it, hmmmm!?""Why don't you tell them what happened. No editing. Just like tell it yourself.""Ohhh? You plan on writing a transcript for this then?""I will if I have to. Just fucking tell them yourself, Ouma.""Geez, fiiiiine.""Good."





	1. Ouma's Side

**Author's Note:**

> Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, Sorry? 
> 
> It's day 7, free day and I've just kinda ruined all y'all's days. Whoopies.

Well, I guess the best place to start is the beginning. Which has to be when we first woke up in there. I can feel a jolt through our bond when he fell out of the locker. I remember asking, “ _What the hell just happened?_ ”

 

But imagine my shock when I got a response, “ _Hello!? Did someone say something!?_ ” He seemed so freaked out! But to be fair, I was also pretty freaked out when I heard a voice in my head that seemed to come from absolutely nowhere. I mean, we’ve all heard the stories of hearing your soulmate, or soulmates, in your head. But to think it was real, or that even I of all people would have one was pretty surprising!

 

And I know if I could feel his shock through the bond, that he could feel mine too. But I still tried to play it off, “ _Yeah! I did! I asked you what you just did. Since it seems like to me you did something that caught you pretty off guard, and it wasn’t my fault! Sooo~ Mysterious stranger that I can hear in my head for some reason, what did you just do?_ ” You know looking back I would kill to have seen Akamatsu-chan’s face when he wasn’t responding to anything she was saying and instead seemed lost in his head.

 

“ _I- wait! Did you just- Oh! I remember hearing about this!_ ” You know it wasn’t till much later did he ever answer me as to what happened. But I did spare him some slack here. “ _We’re soulmates, aren’t we?!_ ”

 

Though it should’ve been obvious, I couldn’t help but mess with him, “ _Noooo~ I just happen to be a mysterious voice in your head that isn’t coming from your imagination._ ” I will say I was kinda happy for the bond since I could **feel** him rolling his eyes at me. But he could also hear my laughter at his expense. I did give back the slack eventually, “ _Okay so maybe I just lied. But seriously, why would you ask? It’s not like I could be much else._ ”

 

He was suuuper embarrassed, but he didn’t let something like that stop him! No! He just kept soldiering on, “ _In that case, I’m Saihara Shuichi. And I don’t mean to alarm, but I don’t know where I am._ ” I can say Kiibaby definitely gave me some weird looks while I tested the way his name sounded. It was actually kinda nice you know. Though don’t tell anyone I said that. I mean it! I’ll send my subordinates after you!

 

But back on topic! I did give him my name back, even if I was tempted not to, “ _It’s okay Saihara-chan! I’m lost too! Oh, though I suppose you haven’t kidnapped me, so I guess I can give you my name. I’m Ouma Kokichi!_ ” You know that’s probably the only good thing that came out of that killing game, I met Shuichi. I just wish I would have met him somewhere else.

 

Though I will say there’s nothing funnier than having one of the first things your soulmate actually ask you be, “ _Were you also trapped in a locker when you awoke by any chance?_ ” Like that’s not a normal question at all! But a minute or two into hearing each other and he asks me that.

 

And so you know, I tell him that, “ _Now that’s a new question! How many people do you know that has woken up in a locker? Though now I’m not sure on my judgment of you not being the one to kidnap me, Mister! With how accurate your question is and all._ ” And I jest, but I think at the time a part of me was really worried he was behind all of it…. Shame when I finally figured out he wasn’t it was too late…. But hey! That’s for later!

 

And I could talk more about this, but it really isn’t that important. I mean all that happened was he tried to protest and defend himself and I poked fun at him until we had to go around and meet everyone else. I think he was shocked when he met me in person. But at the same time, it felt like we both we exactly as expected. Though I knew it would be unwise to reveal we were soulmates, I never said that to him. But he still didn’t say anything to Kiibaby or Akamatsu-chan about it. I don’t think I ever understood why. Another missed opportunity I suppose. But I will say it was nice to have the bond, to hear his thoughts on everyone else and the killing game, at first. Not to say I’d ever give it up for the world! But there were times where I wish I could hide away better, but couldn’t because of it. Though there are times like during the Death Road of Despair that I was glad it was there.

 

Everyone looked so tired, and I could see him try to pretend he wasn’t, but he couldn’t hide it from me, “ _Are you okay Saihara-chan?_ ”

 

He shot me smile from across the room, “ _I’ll be fine Ouma-kun._ ” That’s what he said, but I could feel his exhaustion through the bond. And at this time neither one of us knew how to hold back or hide things from the bond. So for the longest time, everything passed through to the other. And honestly, it was kinda nice to have someone truly understand how I felt. Though it didn’t help when I needed to pretend otherwise, I thankfully learned to hide things for the most part as needed.

 

But at that moment, as I said I was glad and I used that to my advantage. And shouted, “Just stop Akamatsu! You’re free to not give up all you want, but to keep making us go is like a threat!” I can see Shuichi stare at me, could feel his shock at my outburst.

 

Akamatsu seemed to be just as shocked, “A- a… threat…?” I really wondered if she didn’t see it. She acted so much like a leader up until that point. But I guess there’s a reason I got the title of Ultimate Leader and she didn’t.

 

I wonder though if it wasn’t for Shuichi would I still have stood up like that. I like to think I would. And I think my argument was like, “Being forced to do something impossible over and over again is painful. You won’t let us give up and because your argument is sound, we feel we can’t refuse. But isn’t that just torture? All you’re doing is strong-arming us.”

 

And you know what was annoying, how because of how weakly she tried to defend herself I think it was Chabashira who decided to step in and accused me of, and I quote, “Being selfish.”

 

“But I’m not being selfish! Look around you! Everyone feels the same as me! They just don’t want to hurt your feelings and admit it!” I still stand by that statement by the way. Even without the soulmate bond, I could tell everyone was tired. And I think Akamatsu for once finally really looked at everyone. And I could remember everything the mumbles of everyone else. And I could remember how upset she seemed once she realized that she fucked up. In her attempt to do good, she did wrong.

 

Though what pissed me off the most was when fucking Momota tried to get people to keep going. Like he’s a fucking astronaut, he should know when to back down once people have hit their fucking limit! Actually no, what really pissed me off was when Fucking Amami accused me of wanting to start the killing game just because I suggested we use something other than the fucking impossible Death Road of Despair to get out of here! The only good thing was at least Shuichi doubted that I actually meant starting the killing game, even if he didn’t say it out loud. That and despite how they were so ready to fight me for having told Akamatsu to stop they still listened and agreed to my suggestion to meet up in the cafeteria in the morning. And you know something, despite everything they keep doing that until the end. They would accuse me of wanting to start a killing game, and yet they would still listen to me in the end. Guess whoever gave me my ultimate title made one hell of a good call.

  
Fuck…. I’ve gotten so off track. I think I need to keep this short or something, nishishi. Uhhh, where am I even going with this? I guess to the next point that we really used our bond. It was during the first trial. That’s right. Shuichi wouldn’t say anything. I didn’t think he killed Amami, but he just wouldn’t defend himself. I had to ask, “ _Tell me the truth Saihara-chan, what happened when you didn’t have an alibi._ ” He scoffed at me mentally. I saw the irony in what I said, but it didn’t matter at that moment. “ _You didn’t kill him, did you?_ ” He offered me a smile when no one was looking, remorse flooding our bond. I knew I was right, he really didn’t do it. But he was ready to take the fall for it. Part of me hates him for it. He would’ve left me alone just so Akamatsu could live, that is if Momokuma even counted voting him as the right answer. But at the same time, he’d sooner sacrifice himself, then let someone else die. He’s selfless, but I wanted to be selfish for once. I wanted to keep the one person who could even have a chance at understanding me since I couldn’t lie about how I felt through the bond. I could hide it later, but no matter what I did, I couldn’t lie.

 

Maybe that’s why I called Akamatsu out. I backed her into a corner. I knew she couldn’t stand to having fucked up while trying to do the right thing again. And I knew her guilty conscience would never allow her to let someone else take the fall. I pushed her until she confessed. I will say though, I don’t actually hold any ill will towards her in the end. She at least tried to do something while everyone else sat around with their tails tucked between their legs. My biggest regret, in the beginning, was that I didn’t do more. Maybe if I did, the two of them would have lived.

 

Though even then I doubt that actually. I mean I tried to prevent the second murder you know. Tried to get everyone to watch the motive videos. If we knew who was most likely to commit murder then we could prevent it. And maybe I could’ve been more clear with my intent, but Monokuma made an example out of Akamatsu and if I wanted to survive I had to pay attention. So I couldn’t just outright say this was to save people. I was hoping someone would see behind my lies, but no one did. Not even Shuichi, not to say he didn’t ask, because he did ask, “ _What are you planning Ouma-kun?_ ”

 

But even when I begged him to just, “ _Please trust me Saihara-chan. I just need you to trust me._ ” He wouldn’t. And instead he turned against me, and no one was prepared for when Hoshi was murdered. No one was prepared for Mom to be the killer. I tried okay? I did! And even after I gave him a hint in the trial Shuichi still didn’t trust me. Ah but instead he goes along with hypocrite Momota and trusts a literal fucking assassin! We’re fucking soulmates and he’d rather trust a killer over me. Sure he didn’t know she was a killer at the time, but it’s pretty fucking obvious she sure as fuck didn’t take care of children.

 

The only okayish part about all of this was he actually freaked out when Little Miss Assassin tried choking me to death in front of everyone and would’ve tried to stop her if I didn’t tell him to stand down. He actually did beg me to let him do **something.**  But I had a plan. Shame Momota fucked it up too, so somehow everyone was okay with a literal murderer running around freely. But when doesn’t Momota fuck up one of my plans? I try to put everyone’s well-being above escape and he fucks it up and tries to say Akamatsu did nothing wrong. I try to stop the second murder and he fucks it up by convincing everyone to fight me over watching the motive videos. I try to reveal and keep a fucking assassin from killing anyone and he fucks it up. I try to make sure a detective works off of evidence and he fucks it up and gets him to believe in a bullshit, hypocritical idea of just “believing” in people. It isn’t even fucking trust at that point! And not to mention how he will gladly extend that offer to believe in literally everyone, even actual serial killers, but not me. Just me. I’m the only fucking exception. What a fucking “ **hero,** ” right?

 

At least even before showing her ultimate lab, Shuichi still gave enough shit about me to find some first-aid supplies and try to take care of the bruises Miss Assassin gave me. And hey! At least he didn’t think I was going to kill him when we were alone together. So that’s ever so nice of him! I hate him.

 

I hate how he’d come during the free moments and play with me after that. I hate how he kept coming back even with the threat of death. I hate how willing he was to go along with whatever childish shit I came up with this time. I hate how willing he was to just sit around and play over a hundred game of rock, paper, scissors. I hate how hard he tried to find gifts I’d like. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him for making me fall in love regardless of how much he trusts me, which isn’t at all. I hate him for making fall in love in a killing game. I couldn’t keep trusting him! How was I supposed to trust him after this!? He didn’t trust me, but he kept coming back! I…. I’m sorry I don’t know what came over me there. Nishishi, I’m not usually this honest. Maybe I’m losing my mind thinking I can trust you with this. But might as well lose my mind and finish what I started.

 

I wondered how much he truly cared about me back then. But during the seance, there was a bang, and his first reaction was to shout for me. I’m sure if it wasn’t so dark in there he would’ve run over to make sure I was okay. After all, he never did seem to try to hide anything through our bond, if he even knew how to. Despite how I’ve caught him lying to others, when it came to me he wore his heart on his sleeve. Good or bad, I knew it all. I don’t understand why he did that if he didn’t trust me, but I don’t know if I really want the answer to that.

 

I think this was also when I learned that though I could hide a lot of things from him in the bond, I couldn’t hide pain as easily. I know because when I finally fell down in the hall from having hit my head, he came sprinting around the corner. Rushed right up to my side even after my cheers of it being a lie. Even after Miss Assassin told him to leave me. He didn’t. He dragged me downstairs and cleaned it up to the best he could. It’s funny, even Monokuma showed more mercy than everyone but Shuichi then. Said we could take a couple of minutes to clean my injury before the trial began since it would’ve too boring for me to die then of blood loss. But at least it didn’t want me to die yet. That was more than anyone else could say at the time. Sometimes I wonder if he fell in love like I did after we hung out. Sometimes I think I really did steal his heart back then.

 

I mean even after I stole the keycard for the next motive and disappeared for several hours. He still wanted to find me, but not to get the keycard back or punish me for taking it, but just because he was worried about me. Even as I refused to speak despite choking on poisoned air, he was worried. I wouldn’t tell him a single thing, but he cared about me. He didn’t trust me, even then. But even despite that…. I could hear him, “ _Ouma-kun please tell me where you are! Don’t- Don’t lie to me! I can feel it. What’s going on Ouma!? Kokichi!?_ **_Please_ ** _!_ ”

 

I was suffocating and Monokuma just watched and laughed. But I still found myself telling him, “ _Awww, is someone worried? You really shouldn’t be you know. I’m a supreme leader of evil after all!_ ” It felt like there was a glass wall between us at that moment. Like he could see me dying and I could hear him banging on the glass. But I didn’t let up, instead, Monokuma shut the gate and let me catch my breath before sending me on my merry way.

 

I knew there was a limit to Shuichi’s care though. There had to be. And I thought it came when I watched Iruma die. I guess I let some of my panic through because I heard him the whole time freaking out. And even as we went through the trial he just wanted to know what happened. He begged and begged for me to tell him. But I refused to slip up. I was good at pretending. I managed until the end. Though I think I slipped up when Gonta died. I think Shuichi felt it. Because the moment he told me those words, “People like you are alone Ouma-kun, and you always will be!” I could feel his regret the moment the words left his mouth. And I knew I slipped up worse when he flinched. Though to be fair I’ve been choked on multiple occasions and even then it couldn’t compare to how painful it was to hear him say that. To hear your soulmate tell you that you’re going to be alone forever. That even the one person in the world who’s supposed to hold unconditional love for you doesn’t want anything to deal with you. I felt like a monster you know. And hey maybe I am one. I don’t really know anymore. All I know is back then I ran. Ran from the trial room. Ran from my grief. Ran from Shuichi. I just ran all the way to my room and slammed the door shut.

 

I sat on my bed in silence. But it didn’t last long, because soon Shuichi was banging on my door. Soon my head was filled with noise, “ _Please let me in. I’m so sorry Kokichi. I shouldn’t have said that. Oh god, I fucked up._ **_Please_ ** _, I’m sorry. Kokichi…._ ” I felt tears, mine and his. “ _Kokichi, please. Say something. Anything. Tell me you hate me, just say something! Please, Kokichi._ ” He stayed at my door all night. He ended up fall sleep there actually. I know because I tried to leave in the middle of the night and had to rush to catch him before he could slam his head on the ground from where he was previously leaning against the door. I actually ended up tucking him into my bed. It wasn’t like I was planning on coming back to my room after that.

 

No, instead I gathered the electrohammers I had Iruma make and then got ready to set up shop in the gym. And when morning came I sent them down the Death Road of Despair for one final time. I watched as they choked on the same poisoned air that I did. I watched as Shuichi reached for me. As he weakly cried out, “ _What’s going on!? Kokichi!? I- I can’t breathe!_ **_Please!_ **” I hate him for making me want to just shut the door so I can run in and hold him close and reassure him. But I couldn’t. I had a plan.

 

So when I shut the door I brought in the exisals. I strung the best lie I could. And then when Momota went for me, predictable as always. I took him prisoner and left. Shuichi refused to stop prodding at me through our bond though. He didn’t want me to keep walking away. But he couldn’t move from where he stood. And I hate him.

 

I hate him because despite everything he was still worried when the flashback light came and accused me of being a Remnant of Despair. He refused to believe it. He told me that straight up. Told me how they were coming for me. He wanted me to run. But when Momota tried to rebel and Harukawa came a-knocking I refused to bend or break. I took the arrows and the poison. I took all the pain and put a plan in place.

 

But as I laid on the press waiting to die I cried. And I realized Shuichi could feel it all. I smiled a watery smile and asked him, “ _Hey Shuichi, want to make a deal? I know you won’t refuse. End this killing game once and for all. You know what to do!_ ”

 

I could hear him sob and hiccup as stutters through saying, “ _I promise._ ”

 

“ _Nishishi, good! I’m putting my trust in you Shuichi, so put on a good show!_ ” And then the press fell. I felt as every bone in my body was crushed as I suffocated on the poison. And even if I didn’t mean to in my last seconds I tried to hide behind Shuichi’s presence in our bond. And I could feel as he tried his best to hold me. To keep the pain away the best he could. And though my time was too short to even yelp. I felt as he screamed. His body must’ve been alight in pain. His heart must’ve been destroyed. After all, our bond was torn apart. There was always something there. Since the very start, we could feel the other’s presence. But now there was nothing for Shuichi to feel. For once since the beginning of the killing game, Shuichi must’ve been truly alone. I couldn’t respond to him ever again.

 

But I know Shuichi didn’t disappoint. He’s smart. He must’ve used the opportunity I left behind to end this killing game once and for all. I just know it! He kept up his end of our deal. You know I think I lied earlier, I was always glad for our bond. Because it meant I didn’t have to regret never telling Shuichi goodbye. I’m so very glad!

 

I love him.


	2. Saihara's Side

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The second chapter of this mess, uwu

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “So this is what you and Kichi have been working on.”
> 
> “Yup. You can see what’s wrong with this picture though, right?”
> 
> “Yeah… This really isn’t like him is it? … I wonder if has something to deal with his recent nightmares.”
> 
> “Nightmares…? That’s it! Saihara you’re a genius! I’ve been trying to figure out what was wrong this entire time and it’s been staring me in the face! Nightmares, of course. It couldn’t be anything but.”
> 
> “These are his nightmares? Oh Kichi… At least I now know what they were about.”
> 
> “You gonna check on him then I’m guessing?”
> 
> “Of course. Can I keep these?”
> 
> “Obviously.”
> 
> “…Thanks. Hey, I have an idea?”
> 
> “Shoot.”
> 
> “What was the last story he told you out of these?”
> 
> “Uhhhh, I think it was the soulmates one in the killing game with a telepathic bond.”
> 
> “Ahh, I remember that… So that’s what he thought of that in his nightmare then. Here how about I tell the true story of what happened, you know as a thanks of sorts.”
> 
> “I think people would appreciate hearing a happier ending, so if you’re alright with it…” 
> 
> “Yeah… Happy endings are more Kichi’s thing, but I tell this one for him. I think it’d remind him that his nightmares are just that, nightmares.”
> 
> “You know him better than me. But thanks.”
> 
> “… So this is where it starts then?”
> 
> “Yeah. You can start from wherever.”
> 
> “Alright…”

Everything up to the first trial was true. Our strange greeting and the Death Road of Despair, even if I wish I had spoken up then, and my silence during the first trial. But after the first trial that's where things change. First off Kichi wouldn’t beg. He asked me to trust him sure. But he didn’t beg. He wouldn’t beg even if it’d kill him otherwise. He’s just not that kind of person. I think that’s part of the reason I feel for him you know. He’s just so confident. That’s also why when he asked me to trust him, I did. 

 

I spoke out that time, “While Ouma-kun says he wants to watch them to cause a murder don’t you guys think this is a good way to stop a murder?”

 

And I remember Kaito asking, “How’s that?”

 

Somehow I knew the answer that, “Then when would know who has the biggest motive to kill and who seems like the most likely victim. We can keep an eye on both and talk them down from it. We- I couldn’t stop Akamatsu-san. But maybe we can stop it this time.”

 

And honestly I don’t know how, but it worked. Kaito agreed and everyone else went along with it. We all went to the A/V room with the motive video from our room and I don’t remember who, but someone questioned the possibility of Kichi messing with the videos. So I offered to watch over him, to keep him in check. And while I hate how much they distrusted him, I was glad to have the opportunity to be with him. It was nice to be with him when out videos came up. I couldn’t help from clutching at his hand then. I think I ended up hiding my face in his shoulder too… I don’t fully remember. But I do remember when his video came up, he wouldn’t look from the screen but I thought my hand would break from how tightly he was holding it. Not that I could or would have blamed him. 

 

Though it was definitely scary when Maki’s video came up. She glared him and tried to lunge for him, but I had managed to pull us out of her way. She seemed to think it was his fault that her motive video revealed she lied about her talent. Though I sometimes think Kichi had known even before that about her lie. Either way that was enough for everyone to agree on having someone keep an eye on her at all times. I want to believe she’s a good person, and I found out later that she is, but at that moment all I cared about was that she nearly killed my soulmate in front of me. So I wasn’t fond of her at first. 

 

At the end of the viewing though we were right. We found out about Ryoma and Kirumi and managed to talk both of them out of it. Took a while to convince Ryoma to not give up yet, but thankfully we did it. He promised to give us a chance, promised to try finding something to live for. He did eventually find something, he’s doing a lot better now. We’re all pretty proud of him. And just like that though we had prevented that murder.

 

Monokuma was pissed but when he still gave us our “prize” I remember meeting Kichi’s eyes across the room, “ _ We did it. _ ” I felt so much relief. This had painted a target on our backs, but it was so worth it. And I think that was the moment I understood how Kichi felt staring down death and just saying, ‘What’s up Danger?’ as I took the items from Monokuma.

 

I know we should’ve been suspicious when Monokuma waited till we revealed the new labs to give us our new motive, but I was honestly just so excited to have prevented one murder. So when we got Necronomicon I wasn’t expecting it to end in murder. Though at least it got used first. I remember Kichi arguing with Angie to get her to resurrect Kaede over Rantaro despite everything. To this day I don’t know how he managed to convince her, but he did.

 

He wasn’t the most confident during that, after all, I was willing to die so she could live. “ _ She was your best friend, right? _ ” And she was.

 

But like I told Kichi, “ _ She’s my best friend yes, but you’re my soulmate. _ ” Sometimes he needed reminding of that when we first got together. That no matter how close I was to others, at the end of the day it’d still be his arms I was in.

 

This was one of the sweetest things he’s done for me. But unfortunately, after resurrecting Kaede, while Angie must have been trying to put the candle away, she died. Her murderer made a locked room mystery. Thankfully when Kaede resurrected it wasn’t in Angie’s lab otherwise I fear she might have quickly died again there. 

 

But that’s not what happened and it’s no use thinking about what ifs. In reality, Kiyo had suggested a seance after we found Angie’s body. And when me and Kichi tried to bring the cage over he slipped causing the board under him the rock and him to fall through the gap in the floor. He ended up hitting his head against the floor on his way down and we had to call off the seance to pull him out. And though I didn’t want to leave him, Kichi had me go check the other two rooms to see if the boards were the same way in them. Thankfully Kiibo was nearby to watch Kichi, though I didn’t trust him to try to clean Kichi’s head up. No offense to Kiibo, I just doubted a robot knew basic first-aid. 

 

Though Monokuma still proved to be an asshole and before I could really make sure Kichi was alright called the class trial. On the other hand, it was nice to get it down and over with, especially considering how obvious it ended up being. I couldn’t resist asking Kichi, “ _ Are you doing okay over there? _ ” 

 

But like always he was confident, “ _ I will be once that asshole is dead. _ ” I couldn’t blame him for wanting to see Kiyo face justice. After all, everything was going so well. We had prevented one murder. If only we would have stopped that one too. Though there was one good thing, because Kichi fell no one died to the seesaw trick Kiyo tried to use. So at least only one person died instead of two.

 

Though Kichi did continue to give me heart attacks. This time he disappeared after Monokuma handed us the keycard motive. And I am going to be honest, I was terrified already. But when I felt him begin to choke, god I was petrified. “ _ KOKICHI! _ ”

 

“ _ De- death road… _ ” I don’t think I ran faster in my life than then. I thought he was going to die. It felt like I was dying. Like I couldn’t breathe. Like every atom in my body was being torn apart. But I couldn’t stop running. I had to get to him. Thankfully he stopped choking soon and I met him there. He could barely walk, barely speak. But he still tried to say something, “ _ The- the end of it. There’s nothing out there. It- it’s all gone. I- I think I’m scared. God. Shu… I think Miu is going to kill me over this. We- we need to stop her. _ ” It’s funny how just a couple words can strike a cold fear through a person. Because I was scared of what Kichi told me. But I knew he was right, we had to stop her. He wanted to kill her. He was delirious I think. 

 

But still, I agreed, “ _ Then we will. We can knock her out, tie her up, and keep an eye on her. She won’t be killing anyone, nor will we, okay Kichi? _ ” We spent a lot of time planning that idea out further. 

 

But there was one thing we didn’t account for, someone else learning of Miu’s plan. We were on the roof and moving to knock her out when Gonta had come out of nowhere. He tried to help. But he went too far and Miu died. Kichi just had us execute his other plan if things came down to murder. It still makes me sick to think about, but I know Kichi feels so much worse about it than I do. We wanted so hard to stop another murder, but we couldn’t. Instead, we had to send the gentle giant, Gonta, off to his own execution. But somehow he doesn’t blame us. Everyone else does. Or more like everyone blames Kichi. 

 

But he didn’t fight it. And I thought he genuinely planned Gonta’s death. Even through our bond, he put off pure malice. And I couldn’t think and I yelled at him. I think I messed up when I did. I told him, “You’re alone Kokichi, and as long as you act like this, you always will be!” I felt the snap when he turned and ran off. 

 

And Kaito wasn’t planning on forgiving me anyways, so I ran after him. I ended up slamming into his door. Begging him to let me in like he said I did originally. But I never did fall asleep outside of his door. I sat awake until he told me, “ _ I have a plan you know? A very, very bad plan. Even worse than this last one. Are you really okay with that? _ ”

 

And you know what? I don’t think my answer would ever change when I told him, “ _ I trust you. Please let me in. I don’t want to go through this without you. _ ” I meant it. He did end up letting me in after that. His plan was bad as he said it was going to be, but I thought of a way to make things better. Took more preparation, but it was worth it if it meant we both could live. 

 

The next day we went our separate ways and pushed the plan into action. First, getting everyone to the gym to get an electrohammer from Kichi. Then, bringing everyone to the end of the Death Road of Despair. After that, Kichi just said for me to hold my breath. And it’s a good thing I took it literally since the air coming from the door was poisoned. It was nice to know what Kichi saw the first time, made him planning a murder make much more sense. I don’t know how anyone could keep a sane mind after that. I know the only reason I didn't was because Kichi warned me and we had a plan in place. Which speaking of, once he was done with his speech Kaito ran at him as we expected and I pushed him out of the way getting grabbed myself. I’m not sure what happened after that since the force of it combined with the poisoned air caused me to pass out. But I know both me and Kichi made it safely to the exisal hanger since that’s where we were when I woke up to him letting me know step one was complete.

 

And honestly, for this plan, I don’t think I would have been happier to have our bond. Made being stuck in the bathroom a lot more bearable. Least I could know what was going on through Kichi. I just played victim for the most part here. Tell everyone how I have a plan to get out. Thankfully at that point, I was used to lying to everyone in class, that and to moralize it I could say I wasn’t lying. I never specified what I meant by get out after all. Though what wasn’t so great was when they tried to get me away from Kichi because it didn’t go the way anyone had planned. Someone tried to break in early. Maki and Kaede tried to break in early actually. Both ready to kill Kichi if it meant doing what they thought was right. Their master plan was apparent just to torture Kichi into confessing to being a Remnant of Despair, though neither of us knew what that meant at the time, and then just kill him. But I ended up getting in the way of that. And so we retreated to the bathroom and the girls ran off to get an antidote, which Kichi promptly “stole” from me. Thankfully the bottles were lying and there was actually multiple doses in there. 

 

But all of this came down to causing one thing, our final plan to be executed early. We cut out all electronics with an electrobomb and put everything into action. A fake blood trail. The camera. The swap out, which was originally planned to be a body swap, but instead we put bags of blood that Angie had been collecting. I have no idea how she had so many blood bags. I wonder sometimes if she was planning to fake a murder like this herself. Either way, it was still useful. We left behind clothing pieces from each of us, to make it so it looks like it would have been either of us in there. And once everything was done, blood bags crushed, and evidence planted. We hid inside one of the remaining exisals and waited.

 

It was a very tight squeeze, but Kichi curled up in my lap pretty much and we slept for the remaining amount of time. Then the body discovery announcement woke us up, and the relief that it worked swept through us. Though we still had to wait some more while people investigated. Many were dead set on Kichi being the killer. But it’s kinda funny to me because it was like they had forgotten one key thing. We saw everyone’s motive video, including Kichi’s. And his motive video outright says he’s against murder. So even if one of us was dead, it would be more likely that I was the killer than the other way around. I guess it still doesn’t matter though since neither of us was dead in the first place. All we had to do was enforce the idea that one was dead during the trial and we would win.

 

And well this trial really was something else. There was one other thing Kichi didn’t tell me after, he had a backup plan. Everything was fine at first, we got Monokuma to agree it was game over if they couldn’t figure out who the killer was. And everyone, in the end, decided I was the true killer, I was glad that for once they didn’t think Kichi was an evil murderer. But after we opened the exisal and revealed that neither of us was dead, that’s where Kichi’s backup plan came into play. Since Monokuma wanted to cheat and go back on his end of the deal, Kichi decided fine let’s switch up this trial and use it to reveal the true mastermind. 

 

The thing he hadn’t been telling me was that he had done searching throughout the entire school to find the mastermind. During his original plan where he died, he had left clues throughout the school leading to the mastermind. But know that he was still alive and just replaced all of the truth bullets with the ones from his research. Honestly, I’m proud of him. I don’t know if anyone else could’ve done that. He not only did all of this research without Monokuma and mastermind even noticing but also made it irrefutable. So when Shirogane-san tried to protest, in the end, she couldn’t prove that it wasn’t her.

 

Though she still tried to drive all of us into despair. Thankfully once again Kichi was still there to call out her bullshit. Like with the cospox, if we were characters then she should be able to cosplay us. Or all the contradictions between what she says happened and what the book says happened. Pointing out every last plothole in her story. Moments like that really remind me just how much of a genius Kichi is you know. He figured it all out. And I couldn’t be prouder. In the end, Shirofane-san got executed. We broke the dome overhead and left. 

 

Though that wasn’t the end just yet, because for a second time we woke up in a strange place that we didn’t know. Shirogane was right about one thing, it wasn’t real. But why it wasn’t was her lie. Team Danganronpa were real Remnants of Despair, but the Future Foundation had already put a stop to them by the time we woke up. And they were out there waiting for us to wake up. We were going to be okay. Sure everything was like the History of Hope’s Peak Academy said it was, with the whole Greatest, Most Awful Event in Human History. But at least most of the world didn’t want killing games, which seems were to want this more than that. But I don’t think I would change the way I think. There was something nice about finally being able to reveal Kichi was my soulmate without having to worry about everything. 

 

“Oof!” And I think he felt the same considering he nearly tackled me first thing after we woke up. I think we both took the chance we were given to hold on tight and I don’t think either one of us wanted to let go. “ _ We did it Kichi, we won. We’re out. _ ” And if we fell apart into hysterical laughter after hearing that, I don’t think anyone blamed us. We finally got what we were aiming for this entire time and neither one had to watch the other die to get it. I’d say I was never happier than when I was at that moment, but well there’s a reason you can’t try to call just one of us by our last name anymore. 

 

I love him, and let me tell you now, I will never regret that. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> “That’s sweet, but to this day I still call you both by your original last names, what you gonna do about that?”
> 
> “Nothing. If that’s what it takes for you to even say our names then I think I can live with that.”
> 
> “You’re no fun you know that?”
> 
> “And you’re a weirdo.”
> 
> “Et Tu, Saihara!?”
> 
> “Point proven.”
> 
> “You wound me.”
> 
> “No, I don’t.”
> 
> “Lies, but either way shouldn’t you go see your husband now then?”
> 
> “Ahhh, right! I suppose we’ll see you later then?”
> 
> “Yup. We’re still on for that other story, right?”
> 
> “Ah, of course. I’ll see you then.”
> 
> “Later.”


End file.
